Human beings at our core are mostly self centered. And anymore, we are always in a hurry.
I really started paying attention to this a few weeks ago, on a very snowy, slippery morning on the way to work. As I was white-knuckling it down I-75 I came upon a pickup truck in the median on the right side of the highway. It was on it's lid. The driver's door was open and the driver was hanging upside down in his seatbelt. Having once put a car on it's lid in the snow I knew first hand how difficult it is to get your seatbelt unhooked with all your weight resting on it.
I reached over grab my cellphone as I drove past and dialed 1-877-7-PATROL and let the Ohio State Highway Patrol know that he needed assistance. Only after making the call did I stop to wonder why I didn't pull over and help. That caused me to engage in the time honored human tradition of cost-benefit analysis.
Cost – I'll be late for work. It's cold and I don't have a very warm coat on and I don't have any gloves. I don't know him. What if he's a serial killer?
Benefit – Ummmm. . .feeling good that I did the right thing??
We engage in cost-benefit analysis all the time. And, most of the time cost wins. Most of the time we're self-absorbed, self-serving people. And I don't like that about myself. So I decided to change it. And God laughed.
Last Saturday Ali and I were driving down North Main Street in Findlay. It's four lanes of pretty busy traffic. We saw a beautiful Golden Retriever running frantically across all four lanes. Being a creature of habit, if nothing else, I did a quick cost-benefit analysis.
Cost – If we stop we will be late. (For what??? It's Saturday!) All that nasty snow is melting and that dog is muddy and wet! Sammy is in the car. What if we have to take her somewhere to get her home? If we stop, we might have to endure the trauma of watching her get hit by a car as we try to corral her!
Benefit – Ummmm. . .feeling good that we did the right thing??
This time we did the right thing. She came right to us. She didn't have an address tag but she did have a registration from last year. We took her to the Humane Society (Sammy was fine with that) and we assume she found her way back home. We were a little muddier for the experience but we felt a sense of connection with our community that we haven't felt in a long time.
Yesterday, as we were leaving Big Lots (and talking to the check-out clerk about finding that dog the week before!) Ali looked down in the parking lot and found a wallet. It contained a lot of really important things to the 20 year old woman who owned it. We went back into the store to look for her, with no luck. As we thought about how we would be feeling if we lost our ID, Social Security card, work ID and debit cards we realized that she was probably panicking. There was no phone number to call her and if we mailed it she wouldn't have it to buy groceries this weekend or go to work on Monday.
Cost-benefit kicked in.
Cost – I don't want to go back downtown to turn it in to the police! I want to continue on with my Saturday plans!
Benefit – Ummm. . .doing the right thing?
We went back downtown. The police made us sit in the white chairs outside the locked doors for about 20 minutes. We got a tad annoyed but we told each other they have much bigger priorities most of the time than two semi-impatient women with a found wallet. Eventually they dealt with us and promised to try to find the owner quickly.
Whenever I'm faced with a situation that gives me a choice about my actions I engage in the cost-benefit thing. And it's really not all that helpful. There will always be a cost to doing the right thing. And the benefits will probably never outweigh them.
Doing the right thing is always expensive. But so is fixing anything that's kind of broken. Including me.
1 comment:
and God smiled.
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