I know that what I'm about to write is anathema to much of the gay community, but it's my blog and I get to write what I want. Consider yourself warned.
I've been going to Pride for more than 20 years. That many years ago the world was a different place for gay and lesbian people. We were a mostly silent community by necessity. We could lose our housing, jobs, families and even our lives by being too "out." It was the era before Ellen DeGeneres had a talk show, before Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, before we knew things like Iron Chef Cat Cora was carrying her partner's embryo and vice-versa, and before we could legally marry in five states. Going to Pride back then meant stepping out of the shadows and amassing simple numbers for the world to see.
I don't really know what Pride means for the gay community anymore.
If I were in charge of today's Pride Parade it might look something like this: On the lead float are two women getting their kids ready for school - packing lunches, tying shoes, singing songs and wishing them a good day. There would be hugging and laughing.
The second float would feature two men with their baby in a stroller, walking their dog. Maybe they are on their way to get ice cream cones for the family.
The third float might be full of people doing their taxes, cleaning up the house, working in the yard and taking the recyclables to the curb.
Throw in a marching band, some horses and kids tossing candy to the crowds.
Sounds pretty mainstream, huh?
That's the kind of gay community I choose to celebrate. And, I'm disheartened that the only parts of my community that will be shown on TV tonight are the 6'8" mostly naked men wearing rainbow feathered boas and knee-high platform boots waving a rainbow flag.
It only feeds the ugly stereotypes and fuels the kinds of hatred that still exist against me and my family. We just don't need to reinforce any more ignorance in the world.
So, we are at home celebrating Pride. We celebrated by working in the garden, mowing the lawn, buying groceries and eating pizza at home.
You'll have to excuse me now. We're going walk ourselves and the dogs down to Dairy Queen!
Happy Pride everyone.
3 comments:
Your thoughts really show me something important. The evolution of what the 'real' pride events were meant to do is happening. The old days pride was a fascinating event, political,emotional,and dangerous. Today, it is just for the party. Sad that so many younger gays will not get the 'real' meaning of PRIDE, and when I see them emassed I pray that they understand what it should mean, not just the party.
Our family rode in the parade yesterday -- not on one of the party floats, but representing The Arc of Ohio. The gay community in Columbus has "attached" to The Arc and helped us raise money an awareness for the issues that confront those with disabilities and their families... So, when we are invited to join in the celebration of "Pride," we show up, and we smile and wave.
I think, however, that I understand your uneasiness with the "party" atmosphere that surrounds the event. Ours is a polyamorous family, and we are part of the BDSM community. There, too, there is a "younger" generation that does not have a clear sense of the history that has led to the place where they are able to be as "out" as they are today. We often bemoan the shallowness that we perceive in the "new" community we find around us. I wonder, finding this here, if that is not simply a matter of "elders" looking at the generations that follow them...
Funny, but I am the same way about young women today. You see, I once carried petitions for the Equal Rights Amendment -- a very long time ago, and I know; KNOW, that these young women have no idea about the battles we fought so that they could just assume that their place in the world is theirs by "right." Sigh.
I guess the world goes around and the change that we sometimes have to fight and struggle to create, happens. Perhaps our own grumpy pointing to the children and young adults who grow up experiencing the fruits of that change is just one of the signposts that point to how far we have come.
All the best,
swan
I had thoughts when I clicked on comment, but can't seem to get them in coherent order now.
I've heard some of the same sentiments from a relative and a few friends. They wonder why they can't just... be. Moms, dads, friends whose preference for the same gender is really just a small part of who they are.
Like, "I can't wait to have you meet my friend Annette. She is a terrific artist!"
Without adding the caveat.. 'of course, she's married to a woman.'
You're not actually saying that the media will only show what they want everyone to see, are you?
;)
Post a Comment